Preemie support group

Well it's finally come to fruition.

While C and E were still in NICU and at their most poorly Z and I were desperately looking for some support, unfortunately the local branch of the German Preemie Association was no longer functioning (they were all in the midst of 2nd pregnancies apparently) so we were left hanging. Thankfully a preemie mom from a neighbouring area took pity on us and came to the hospital to chat to us and cheer us on for which we were very grateful. To have someone to speak to who has lived through the hell of NICU and can empathise and encourage was fantastic, she also gave us great tips for things to watch for and post discharge tips.

However the Children's hospital has now set up it's own group and last night was the first meeting. Our good friend J came to babysit so both Z and I could go as we felt it was very important to be there. The nurse running the session was one of C and E's NICU nurses so it was wonderful to see her again and to update her with what our girls are up to. There were 3 sets of "new" preemie parents and 3 sets of "old" preemie parents so it was quite small but lots of interesting topics were raised and discussed. I just hope we get the opportunity to offer the "newer" parents the same support we received.

I had to laugh though as at the beginning of the meeting the nurse said Z and I were partly responsible for the group being established, as while we were on the PNZ (small NICU at the obstetrics hospital) and so desperate for support they felt bad as they couldn't offer us anything and that helped push the development of this group. Now we are going to have to keep attending these meetings ;0).

Sleeping

I don't know what I did right but the girls have had a 3 hour nap this morning and are one and a half hours into their midday nap. Hopefully they will be so well rested that they will be in a good mood this evening and we get to skip the 2 hour moan session from 4pm until 6pm!!

Ciara has been practicing walking in her first pair of proper shoes, at first she would only crawl with them on, but yesterday she started walking as well. She walks like she has concrete blocks on her feet whick looks very awkward and ungainly but at least she is now trying again. We decided not to get Enya shoes yet as she is still mostly crawling (although there has been a dramatic improvement in the last week in her walking ability) and we also got a bit frightened by the shoe sales lady saying that they grow out of shoes in 6-16 weeks at this age. Enya has smaller feet so we were thinking in a month or so we might go and buy a second pair of shoes for Ciara and give Enya the first pair. Depends if the girls have another growth spurt in the next few weeks!

monkey's wedding

In good old South Africa we used to call it "a monkey's wedding" when the sun shone while it was raining. So what do you think it's called when the sun is shining while it is snowing? Funnily enough it never came up in SA, although that is what it was doing here this afternoon.

I'm beginning to worry that people will think I'm beating up on my girls, Enya has her first black eye. I didn't see how she did it yesterday but she had a huge egg just below her right eye and this morning she has a black eye. Given how often they fall over and the fact we have no carpets o our tile floors, I'm surprised they are not completely black and blue. I guess the paediatrician was right, babies bounce although please don't test that theory out at home!!

Some good news is Enya has made a huge stride forward this week in her walking ability, basically since we started the exercises given to us by the Heilpaedegogin. She is more stable and not swaying quite as much when walking, she is also walking more and more. However if she wants to get anywhere fast, crawling is still her method of choice.

Cookie snatcher

I remember way back when, when I was planning my "world trip*" with my best friend in South Africa we arranged to meet up with a friend of a friend's boyfriend who just happened to be english. We wanted to pump his brains for the all important information we needed as first time overseas travellers so we didn't stand out as yokels when we arrived in London. One of the things he told us (and the only thing that really stuck in my memory) was the english (London) slang names for children: sprog = infant, snot gobbler = older baby, cookie snatcher = toddler. Where am I going with this you ask? I have my own little cookie snatcher!

I was baking biscuits yesterday for Z to take to work in honour of his birthday (better late than never), and it was getting quite late in the afternoon. Ciara had done her usual spit out of the teatime yogurt as it had tiny cubes of pear in it (Ciara does not do fruit bits!), so she was quite peckish. I'd put the first batch on the cooling rack and turned back to get the second tray out of the oven, when I turned back to the table I saw Ciara taking a huge bite out of a cookie. By the time I'd got rid of the hot tray and oven gloves she'd eaten half the biscuit! It was still hot from the oven and it was very gingery cookie, even I can only eat 2 of these cookies at a time as they are so spicy and I love ginger. As it was nearly dinner time I took the remains off her and put them on the table, when I turned back to her I caught her snatching another cookie from the rack!

In other news, Enya has taken to trying to get into all the nooks and crannies behind or between furniture. I've even found her edging herself between the wall and our freezer which is so narrow a gap that she couldn't even turn her head when she wanted to come out, she scared herself silly there and I landed up having to rescue her as she was stuck. Unfortunately she hasn't learnt her lesson and continues to explore behind her bed, edge behind the bathroom cabinet and crawl under our rocking chair. I'm now just waiting for her to try crawl under our bed, she'll get eaten by the dustballs there! That'll teach her ;0)!!

*the world trip was literally supposed to be around the world, I got stuck in England for 2 years before finally getting to Australia for a year. I returned to England for another couple years before moving to Germany. I haven't even seen much of the rest of Europe, so so much for around the world!!

Wedensday

Sorry no spiffy title today, I didn't get a lot of sleep last night and we were up and out early this morning as we had an early doctors appointment (vaccinations, thankfully the last set until the girls go to school).

Ciara was up multiple times last night and was calling so loudly that the last time I went in to their room Enya was also wide awake, standing at her cot side and calling "mama" too. Ciara just wanted a cuddle that last time and then slept through from 3 am until 6 am this morning.

Unfortunately the lack of sleep means I'm feeling all out of sorts and have the patience of a grizzly. Today is not a good day for Enya to decide to play games at mealtimes!! Her latest trick is to turn her head away when we are trying to feed her and then to keep looking back before quickly turning her head away again. Now before you think well maybe she's full or doesn't like it, if we then try to feed Ciara, Enya whinges until we turn back to her again where after one spoon the cycle repeats. Meals are now taking over 3/4 of an hour, so much for the 20 minute meal limit we were given by the behavioral therapists.

Hopefully things go better at dinner as Z is getting his birthday dinner tonight (birthday was yesterday but he was playing volleyball), it would be nice if we could all eat peacefully together!

Kindergarten (Kita) and Fruhforderung

Well we have appointments to visit all 4 Kindergartens (yup I forgot one yesterday) over the next 3 weeks. The response was quite positive from all of them i.e. it doesn't sound like they are full yet so hopefully it will all work out. Thankfully I could arrange it so that Z will be coming with to at least of 2 of the Kitas, he always has sensible considerations and questions where I tend to get fixated on superficial things (colours on the wall and such like).

The Fruhforderung* appointment went much better than I expected, I think it helps that I went in with very low expectations! The therapist (we'll call her Mrs. R) noted after observing Enya briefly playing that she is all over the place. She can't settle down and concentrate on a game/task and this means she is not getting a chance to practice her fine control/coordination. Within 10 minutes Mrs. R said one appointment was not enough, she could give me a few things to work on at home but that is not enough. Enya needs help so that she can centre herself and concentrate on a task, right now she is unable to filter out extraneous objects and sounds and so is constantly distracted.

I have to pack away the toys so we only play with one toy at a time, for instance if we play with the building blocks, only have 10 blocks out so she is not distracted by the other 100 blocks or toys lying around. We also have an exercise I like to call "pack the parcel" : I have to pack Enya in to a cuddle with her arms and legs pressed to her body and give her a gentle squeeze and hold this for 3-5 seconds. This is supposed to help with her body awareness and to teach her how to keep still for brief periods. She gave us a couple of other games to play, the only problem is I'm supposed to play one on one. My girls get very jealous if they think I'm paying more attention to the other, if I try read a book to one, the other usually comes and grabs it out my hands or starts pulling/pushing on me to gain my attention. Now I'm supposed to try get 5 minutes alone with a child multiple times a day (she wants me to work with both Ciara and Enya), I think I'm going to have to try distraction and then hide behind the baby gates!

All in all it was a very informative and productive day, hopefully I will be able to put most of what I was shown today into practice without scaring Enya too badly (Mrs. R wants me to sing to her, now that is a frightening thought!).

*The best description for Fruhforderung is play therapy. They take mostly an advisory role showing how to encourage normal development through play.

Busy busy

I was gently reminded this evening that if I want the girls to go to Kindergarten then I do actually need to register them. Before I do that of course I have to visit the 3 establishments in our area and decide which one I prefer (and find out if I'm not already too late to get them in, aaah the delights of twins). So tomorrow morning will be spent on the phone hopefully arranging visits. We only really want them to start when they are 3 but early registration is vital as places are limited.

Then I have just realised that my passport is only valid until September this year and we have booked a 2 week holiday in Turkey in June. Turkish entrance requirements state your passport must be valid for at least 6 months from the date of entry so I need to get a new passport and quickly as I also need to get a visa. As a British national I don't often need visas and apparently german passport holders don't so lucky that I thought to check. Tomorrow midday nap will be spent trying to get everything put together for my passport renewal application. Come to think of it I have to get the girls passports too, now that will be fun. They are very strict about the biometric photos, how do you get a baby to look straight at the camera, not smile and not close their eyes. I think Z can take them to get their passport photos, I wash my hands of it!!

Then just to round things off nicely we have the Fruhforderung ("early intervention") appointment tomorrow afternoon, I'm really not expecting much from it, they have pretty much flat out said it is a once off appointment and they do not feel they can offer us any help. Before we go though I have to go to the paediatrician to pick up the referral. I hate the stupid bureaucracy here, we need a new referral every 3 months even when we just come for preemie follow ups!