... and it's actually been easier than I thought. If they get up to mischief I'm just telling them no firmly and then redirecting (or trying to) their attention. Z laughed when he first heard my challenge but today I noticed he was also not yelling in circumstances where normally he would. So double goody!!
I'm particularly interested to see if they listen better at the end of the 30 days. Right now we tell them no, they look directly at us and then do precisely what we told them not to. Let's see if reducing the volume increases the auditory uptake. I live in hope!
12 Dec 2009
11 Dec 2009
Fishwife
I feel like a fishwife. I seem to spend the whole day yelling at one or other child not to do something or for doing something (or for not listening!).
Last night as I was doing the blog jumping thing I came across a blog talking about yelling at children (as usual I can't find it again so I can't link it). Now obviously I knew that yelling is not exactly beneficial to the child, but I've always thought it less harmful than hitting on those days where the frustration levels just keep rocketing. However this blog really put into perspective that yelling alone is also very destructive. The sentence that remains with me and kept me up late last night was along the lines of ....the intent of yelling is to frighten and terrorize the child. Do I really want to be terrorising my precious girls? I think we all agree the answer is a resounding NO!
So I'm setting myself a challenge: 30 days without yelling at Ciara and Enya. Wish us all luck!
Last night as I was doing the blog jumping thing I came across a blog talking about yelling at children (as usual I can't find it again so I can't link it). Now obviously I knew that yelling is not exactly beneficial to the child, but I've always thought it less harmful than hitting on those days where the frustration levels just keep rocketing. However this blog really put into perspective that yelling alone is also very destructive. The sentence that remains with me and kept me up late last night was along the lines of ....the intent of yelling is to frighten and terrorize the child. Do I really want to be terrorising my precious girls? I think we all agree the answer is a resounding NO!
So I'm setting myself a challenge: 30 days without yelling at Ciara and Enya. Wish us all luck!
9 Dec 2009
Eyes: good
The title says it all. We had the 2 hour appointment at the Eye Guy today and again nothing needs doing. I had to sit on Ciara so that they could get the eyedrops in and the Eye Guy could only make a guestimate with her eyes as she screamed and flailed around during her eye exam so he couldn't get a really good look (that was with no torture instruments, just shining a light to look in her eye). Enya also protested strongly to the eye drops but cooperated brilliantly with all the other tests and exams.
As we were already in the city we had a lovely wander around the centre and so long as we kept moving the girls were happy. I love walking around the shops at Christmas time, it kick starts the festive feeling seeing all the decorations. Somehow I really need that this year, as I haven't really got the Xmas feeling at all yet. It was especially nice to get out the house again as the last week the weather has been so wet we've only been outside for doctors and therapy visits.
Talking about therapy, we finally had our Speech therapy assessment yesterday. The therapist (Hr H) was really battling to engage with Enya, hopefully that will get better as she gets used to him. Yesterday though she watched him with a very serious suspicious look on her face and kept moving out of his way when he wanted to touch her for exercises. We have another appointment in 6 weeks and in the meantime a load of exercises to do. The theory is that she has reduced sensation/awareness in/of her mouth and this is the reason she stuffs her mouth so full and pockets her food in her cheeks and under her toungue. So the exercises are aimed at increasing her oral awareness. Z's reaction was to laugh so I guess once again the exercises will all just be done by me.
Rainy day entertainment: unpacking the plastic drawer for the 20th time in a day
As we were already in the city we had a lovely wander around the centre and so long as we kept moving the girls were happy. I love walking around the shops at Christmas time, it kick starts the festive feeling seeing all the decorations. Somehow I really need that this year, as I haven't really got the Xmas feeling at all yet. It was especially nice to get out the house again as the last week the weather has been so wet we've only been outside for doctors and therapy visits.
Talking about therapy, we finally had our Speech therapy assessment yesterday. The therapist (Hr H) was really battling to engage with Enya, hopefully that will get better as she gets used to him. Yesterday though she watched him with a very serious suspicious look on her face and kept moving out of his way when he wanted to touch her for exercises. We have another appointment in 6 weeks and in the meantime a load of exercises to do. The theory is that she has reduced sensation/awareness in/of her mouth and this is the reason she stuffs her mouth so full and pockets her food in her cheeks and under her toungue. So the exercises are aimed at increasing her oral awareness. Z's reaction was to laugh so I guess once again the exercises will all just be done by me.
Rainy day entertainment: unpacking the plastic drawer for the 20th time in a day
6 Dec 2009
Happy St Nikalaus
For the last few weeks Ciara has been waking between 2-4am and unfortunately Z is quite hard of hearing so I'm the one that goes through to settle her down. The fact is, she often just wants to check that it is still dark outside and then after a sip of water goes back to bed without any fuss. I, on the other hand, then toss and turn for the rest of the night and am getting a little bit snappy again due to lack of sleep.
To celebrate St Nikalaus Day today though, I was able to sleep in until 5:30am before the screamfest started and Z even got up to deal with Ciara so I actually got to lie in a bit longer. The girls and Z all got a little chocolate St Nikalaus figure in their bags, traditionally one is supposed to use stockings or shoes for the small gifts - maybe next year. I hadn't even had time to give the girls their bags before Ciara wandered through with half a chocolate man. She'd found the bag herself and unwrapped and devoured half the chocolate before I'd even noticed. Oh well, she followed that up by eating all her breakfast so no harm done.
We had originally planned on going to the local christmas market today but unfortunately it poured all day so instead we hibernated indoors. The monotony was obviously too much for the girls, they retaliated by scribbling on our cream leather footstool with red khoki. I knew the scribbling was going to happen at some stage but wish that they could have left our furniture out of it!
To celebrate St Nikalaus Day today though, I was able to sleep in until 5:30am before the screamfest started and Z even got up to deal with Ciara so I actually got to lie in a bit longer. The girls and Z all got a little chocolate St Nikalaus figure in their bags, traditionally one is supposed to use stockings or shoes for the small gifts - maybe next year. I hadn't even had time to give the girls their bags before Ciara wandered through with half a chocolate man. She'd found the bag herself and unwrapped and devoured half the chocolate before I'd even noticed. Oh well, she followed that up by eating all her breakfast so no harm done.
We had originally planned on going to the local christmas market today but unfortunately it poured all day so instead we hibernated indoors. The monotony was obviously too much for the girls, they retaliated by scribbling on our cream leather footstool with red khoki. I knew the scribbling was going to happen at some stage but wish that they could have left our furniture out of it!
4 Dec 2009
Preemie follow up
Today we had the big preemie follow up (read the Bayley's test) to check what developmental age the girls are at at age 2.
As I've mentioned before the myth that micropreemies catch up by age 2 is very rarely the case and as expected our girls are not magically caught up to their actual age of 2 and a quarter years. Ciara has amost caught up to her adjusted age of 2 years though. She only needed one point more and she would have been graded as a 24 month old-if she hadn't been so tired she would have managed that point easily as she didn't manage a couple of tasks during the assessment that I've seen her do many times at home. Enya is still a bit behind (22 months) and I think her performance was an accurate reflection of her ability (she was assessed first and was so fresh and eager). I'm not disappointed as even the doctor said her progress since she last saw her in June is amazing. There is no way she could have sat and completed the test with Enya in June. Enya wouldn't have been able to concentrate even to complete one of the tasks, never mind for the whole test in one sitting which is what she did today!
Surprisingly we have to go back again for a redo of this test in about a year, I was told they only followed up to 2 years but they apparently follow up longer in the micropreemies. Next time though I will have the girls appointments on different days so the second child isn't disadvantaged due to the long waiting time.
We also have an appointment at an orthopod now for next year to get Enya's hips looked at. She still has a funny gait ( leg movement comes from swinging her hips) and her hips are extremely hypermobile so just for safety sake we're going for a check up.
Right now I think the GI doctors are the only "common" specialist that we haven't seen in the last 2 years, and God willing we won't need to either!
As I've mentioned before the myth that micropreemies catch up by age 2 is very rarely the case and as expected our girls are not magically caught up to their actual age of 2 and a quarter years. Ciara has amost caught up to her adjusted age of 2 years though. She only needed one point more and she would have been graded as a 24 month old-if she hadn't been so tired she would have managed that point easily as she didn't manage a couple of tasks during the assessment that I've seen her do many times at home. Enya is still a bit behind (22 months) and I think her performance was an accurate reflection of her ability (she was assessed first and was so fresh and eager). I'm not disappointed as even the doctor said her progress since she last saw her in June is amazing. There is no way she could have sat and completed the test with Enya in June. Enya wouldn't have been able to concentrate even to complete one of the tasks, never mind for the whole test in one sitting which is what she did today!
Surprisingly we have to go back again for a redo of this test in about a year, I was told they only followed up to 2 years but they apparently follow up longer in the micropreemies. Next time though I will have the girls appointments on different days so the second child isn't disadvantaged due to the long waiting time.
We also have an appointment at an orthopod now for next year to get Enya's hips looked at. She still has a funny gait ( leg movement comes from swinging her hips) and her hips are extremely hypermobile so just for safety sake we're going for a check up.
Right now I think the GI doctors are the only "common" specialist that we haven't seen in the last 2 years, and God willing we won't need to either!
2 Dec 2009
Alone again
Z is off at a conference today and tomorrow which means I have the girls all to myself again. As they get older it is definitely easier handling them alone, although I can't wait for them to eat all by themselves as well!! We're going to have a couple of quiet days before a very busy Friday.
I also need to get going with preparations for Christmas, apart from an Advents wreath and a couple of pressies I have done nothing in that direction yet. At least we will be spending the big day at home alone so I don't have to worry about a fancy Christmas dinner!
I also need to get going with preparations for Christmas, apart from an Advents wreath and a couple of pressies I have done nothing in that direction yet. At least we will be spending the big day at home alone so I don't have to worry about a fancy Christmas dinner!
1 Dec 2009
Neuro update
Normal!!
I was concerned as the neuro wanted to continue seeing Enya although she's discharged Ciara. Yesterday though I found out Enya's EEG is normal and has been for a while (I've asked before but I find the german doctors are really closed mouthed and it's difficult to get answers from them). She is only bringing us back as Enya is still receiving therapies.
For the first time since the girls were released from NICU, I got to hold one while blood was taken. I've mentioned in the past that Enya always has moist feet and the neurologist noticed this yesterday and wanted to check her thyroid levels (I love how the neurologist is the one noticing this and ordering this test!).
Apropro therapies: the speech therapy appointment was a wash out, our appointment was at 11am. We were there early (for once) and at 10 minutes to 11 I saw the therapist (Hr H) take another patient in to his room. I thought oops I obviously had the wrong time in my mind and the appointment must have been half past 11...but then our play therapist came to collect Ciara. We'd arranged for her to see Ciara while Enya and I were with the speech therapist so we wouldn't be distracted. Apparently Hr H was running late and so we all started off at play therapy. Unfortunately by the time Hr H came to pick us up at quarter to 12, the girls were so overtired they had hit the nonsense hyperactive stage (effects of spending 2 hours in variuos waiting rooms) so we had to cancel the speech appointment and have rescheduled it for next week instead.
Today I went to visit my old boss to start the ball rolling about going back to work next year August. Z and I now just need to sit down and calculate how many hours are worth working (the joys of tiered tax systems, I'd really resent working for more hours only to take home less money) as I'm going back part time. I also need to decide if I'd rather work fewer longer days or more shorter days. The good news though is that it looks like I'm going back to the hospital down the road from me so the Kindergarten will be 5 minutes walk from work.
It was great to see my old colleagues, although there is such a high personnal turn over there that not many faces were familiar, and to show Ciara and Enya off to them. I was especially brave today and for both the work visit and play group left the pram in the car- both involved quite a bit of walking but the girls are getting better about holding my hands when we are afield and if not, winter coats are great to grap and hold onto!
I was concerned as the neuro wanted to continue seeing Enya although she's discharged Ciara. Yesterday though I found out Enya's EEG is normal and has been for a while (I've asked before but I find the german doctors are really closed mouthed and it's difficult to get answers from them). She is only bringing us back as Enya is still receiving therapies.
For the first time since the girls were released from NICU, I got to hold one while blood was taken. I've mentioned in the past that Enya always has moist feet and the neurologist noticed this yesterday and wanted to check her thyroid levels (I love how the neurologist is the one noticing this and ordering this test!).
Apropro therapies: the speech therapy appointment was a wash out, our appointment was at 11am. We were there early (for once) and at 10 minutes to 11 I saw the therapist (Hr H) take another patient in to his room. I thought oops I obviously had the wrong time in my mind and the appointment must have been half past 11...but then our play therapist came to collect Ciara. We'd arranged for her to see Ciara while Enya and I were with the speech therapist so we wouldn't be distracted. Apparently Hr H was running late and so we all started off at play therapy. Unfortunately by the time Hr H came to pick us up at quarter to 12, the girls were so overtired they had hit the nonsense hyperactive stage (effects of spending 2 hours in variuos waiting rooms) so we had to cancel the speech appointment and have rescheduled it for next week instead.
Today I went to visit my old boss to start the ball rolling about going back to work next year August. Z and I now just need to sit down and calculate how many hours are worth working (the joys of tiered tax systems, I'd really resent working for more hours only to take home less money) as I'm going back part time. I also need to decide if I'd rather work fewer longer days or more shorter days. The good news though is that it looks like I'm going back to the hospital down the road from me so the Kindergarten will be 5 minutes walk from work.
It was great to see my old colleagues, although there is such a high personnal turn over there that not many faces were familiar, and to show Ciara and Enya off to them. I was especially brave today and for both the work visit and play group left the pram in the car- both involved quite a bit of walking but the girls are getting better about holding my hands when we are afield and if not, winter coats are great to grap and hold onto!
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